Decorating for Christmas

Thanksgiving is over.  Radio stations are blasting their Christmas line ups.  Black Friday shoppers nudging people out of the way.

For us, it’s time to get the decorations up.

This was the first year that Liam was engaged in helping to getting the ornaments on the tree.

He quickly began knocking them all down 5 minutes later…but progress is progress. IMG_20171124_132911249IMG_20171124_193028527IMG_20171124_150450691IMG_20171124_150514530IMG_20171124_153200472


Road Trip to Delaware


Tied up as many loose ends as I could this morning, then packed Patti, Maddex and Liam in the car and pointed the car south for Delaware.  Reheboth Beach to be more specific.

Why Delaware?  1.  It’s on the way to our final destination in Virginia.  2. It’s awesome. 3.  I have fond memories of this area. (always a catch isn’t there?)

It was the last vacation I ever took with my immediate family.   It was the summer of 06 and I was in a very isolated point in my life.  I had just withdrew from College and lost my finance in the same day that past February.

I entered a state of seclusion where I hid from the outside world.  Only emerging  work in restaurants, which was about 80 hours a week.  I had a couple of close friends that refused to let me become a total hermit.

However, my mom besieged me to take a week off to drive her, my grandmother, and younger brother down to see my Aunt in Delaware.

The trip was very therapeutic.  I spent the week thinking about how there was so much more out there.  That I was barely living a “half life”.  When I returned I enrolled in the Culinary Arts Program and began piecing my life together.

Surviving the car ride is the hard part.  Getting down route 81 and then horrifying  476 when you get to Philadelphia and traffic turns into a slow crawl for a good hour.  You’re in the homestretch once your cross into Delaware’s RT 1S.

We made it to our destination about 430PM.  Let the vacation begin.




I know I’m Lame…but I miss Quiznos. 



846eae2ed0503e9e95e8baf1cd4fe7e0Dec. 30st

Like so many other people, I found 2016 to be a not very good year.  But my year was bad because of politics, the economy, or the vast string of celebrity deaths.  As 2016 drew to a close I found myself to probably me the most unhappy that I have ever been.  Unhappy with my work, my marriage, and with life in general.  The problem was that the reason for my unhappiness was unclear.  I had a have job, a recently purchased house, and a beautiful family, but I found myself constantly trying to escape to a new life.

I knew I had to find a way to fix these feelings of discontent.  It wasn’t until I found an audio book named THE HAPPINESS PROJECT, by Gretchen Rubin that I hoped would point me in the right direction.  The Happiness Project Chronicles a year in the life of a NYC wife and mother of two as she makes 12 months of resolutions all centered about making her happier.  Was it easy for her? Of course not.  But after a year of blogging about her experience she found herself the happiest she had ever been and it didn’t require a major life change.  It inspired me to start my own Happiness Project.  January 1st is just around the corner and I can’t wait to get started



December 31st

A little bit about myself before I dive into why I am starting a Happiness project.

I’m 30 years old living in a small suburb near to Syracuse, New York.  I am married with 3 boys.  Maddex (11) technically my step son but I love and care for him like my own, Lucas (5) lives with his Mother in Buffalo when he is not with us. Liam (2) we had shortly after we got married.  My wife Patti and I have been together almost 5 years now.

I work as a General manager in a local restaurant and my wife works a server at a different restaurant.  We don’t rely on babysitters so we have to work opposite shifts which can prove very difficult.

So Why am I starting a happiness project?  As I said about there was no major, defining reason for my unhappiness.  Just a lot of small ones.

– not on the top of my game a work : after three straight years of being in the upper tier of performance in my company, my performance seems to have peaked Now i have slipped into the mediocre at least in my own mind

lack of close relationships: Throughout my life I have only have a couple close friends at a time. My two best friends in my adult life  have both more off intro their own adult lives

lack of relationship with,  my wife Patti : Patti leaving her job and going back to Zebbs (restaurant) added new stress on our relationship. Sure she was making more money which was a huge source of stress when she wasn’t. But now she was working 5 nights a week and going in at 5. Which gave us a few minutes together each of those days. And Monday nights. sometimes we would get luck with a Friday night or Tuesday morning but that was occasional.

amount of time seeing  Luke: my first son Lucas, I have had trouble coping with only seeing him every other weekend. his mother has recently gotten engaged with has been this anxiety escalate.

struggles with work – loosing my right hand and assistant in the middle of the year has proved a challenge. My current management team is good but we still have a lot of growing to do

It’s NYE obviously,

Check out my post explaining exactly what a happiness project consists off.

Then check back  for January’s resolutions


I Didn’t Come This Far To Only Come This Far.

“I didn’t come this far to only come this far.
I hear some people saying things like: 
“When I make it”
, “When I get to the top”…

 “I’ll keep working hard until i get to the top”, 
“until I reach my goal”

Let me tell you something:
 There is no “END”!
If you reach your GOAL: SET A BIGGER GOAL.
If you get to the top of the mountain: Find a bigger mountain!

It’s the journey.
The continued pursuit of growth.
The constant seeking of improvement. 
That’s what makes life great.
That’s what makes a fulfilled life.

I didn’t come this far to only come this far!
When I get this GOAL: I’ll seek MORE. 
Not more things. MORE GROWTH.
Constantly pushing myself to be better.

I didn’t come this far to only come this far!
I came this far so I could be strong enough to go further!
So I would be good enough to push myself harder!

 I’m only getting started.
 This is just the beginning.

I AM proud of my achievements, but that doesn’t mean I’ll settle for them.

A true winner doesn’t seek only the title.
 A true winner seeks GROWTH. 
A true winner seeks GREATNESS.
It’s the JOURNEY. 

Don’t tell me it’s over. 

 If the journey wasn’t challenging, the destination wouldn’t be rewarding.
It’s the challenge that makes the greatness.

You can’t have a champion athlete without great competitors pushing them all the way.
You can’t have the greatest of all time without champions pushing them all the way.

It’s the journey. The process, that makes the greatness.

If you reach your GOAL: SET A BIGGER GOAL.
If you get to the top of the mountain: Find a bigger mountain!”


Thank you all for sharing this year important year with me.

I would say “The End” but there is so much more to come.

Some much for me to look forward to.

Goodbye for Now.  Happy New Year.




“Meant To Do Great Things” – One More Story.

“Because when I was young and I’d get an A on a history test.. or whatever.. I’d get this good feeling about all the things that great things I could be. And then I never became any of those things. ”  Chris Gardner. Pursuit Of Happyness

It’s New Year’s Eve and today marks the last day of my years long blog and project to bring more happiness into my life as well as the other’s around me.

I shared a lot with those who followed me this year but theres one personal story that I have not shared that I find  fitting to share now as we close the 2017 chapter and start a new one.

Because it not over.  For me it’s just beginning.

It may sound insignificant to most but 15 years ago a teacher, practically a stranger said something to me that has stayed with me to this day.

I was away on a school retreat when I was a junior in high school.  I was a good, not great student.  Shy, quiet, with a core group of friends.  Fairly undistinguished.    I had no idea who I was and what I was going to me.

We were broken into a group called a “break out”.  The purpose was the break out was to go around in a circle and everyone would say something nice about one person in the group.  This would go on until everyone had the opportunity to be praised.

When it was my turn to be showered with compliments, I got the usual genetic words “friendly, funny, supportive”, but what took me by surprise was the words from the teacher/chaperone of the group.

He was my 10th Grade Global Studies teacher.  We had never exchanged more than two words to each other that didn’t have to do with the Ottoman Empire or the spread of Judaism in whatever centrury it was.

What he said was , “I believe Bill is meant to do great things, even if we don’t know what they are yet.”

He nor I didn’t know it at the time.  But that comment has stayed with me all this time.  It has helped me get through some hard times and now more than ever I feel like I am poised and ready to make that step towards “great”.

Thank you Mr. Troy.  “May the road rise up and meet you”.




My 2017 Highlights

Near the end of every year I look back at the past twelve months and I always think to myself, “I could have  accomplished more,  I could have done better, I could have had more fun, I could have made the year more than what it was.”

This year is no exception, but not so fast, that just me. “Proud but never satisfied.”

While there is always room for improvement, these year had some big highlights that I would like to share.


  • We learned about Liam’s Autism and ADHD and how to adjust our parenting style.  He still sleeps in our bed so Operation Childless Bed is still in umm…progress but he’s my little buddy and I love our daily routine
  • Lucas started first grade.  Seems just like yesterday the news that he was going to be born sent me burning down my old life for the role of boss, caregiver, and daddy.
  • My stepson, Maddex, when from being a little squirt into a teenager.  The kid must have shot up 6 inches with his long hair and cracking voice.
  • I learned about my own ADHD and how to treat it, harness it, and use it to my advantage.  Sometimes it fails me.  Today even.
  • I traveled, a lot.  Near and Far.  Tourist traps and obscure trails.  I did everything that I could find time for and afford and loved every minute of it.
  • I improved my performance in the Tough Mudder and Boilermaker after a few years in decline
  • I lost 20 lbs.
  • I had my career year at work.
  • I found a level of balance that i can be proud of.
  • I came to understand what makes me happy and what doesn’t


it’s been said that you can only adjust your happiness a small amount.  That being said, when I look at how I felt at the end of 2016 and I how I feel now, I can feel the difference and so can the others around me.

I can look to 2018 with a sense of hope.

Only two more posts left.





2018 Resolutions

In 2017, I had 88 resolution.  8 per month for 11 months.

This year I will go back to being normal and narrow my scope.   I plan on writing down everyday directly under my 10 goals.

These are the 5 resolutions that I feel will most improve my day to day.

  1.  Get more sleep :  There is no substitute for a good night of sleep.  Sleep Deprivation can lead to poor focus, weight gain, and irritability. 

2   Cut out the white :  Cut back on anything white.  Flour, Salt, and sugar

3.  Lighten up : Why so serious? 

4.  Nice or nothing : intentional or not, I can be mean sometimes.  Learn to only say nice things to others or don’t say anything at all. 

5.   Find Time To do Nothing:  I love my structured life but there needs to times to relax, refresh, and chill.  




Obscurus CNY Blog Is Now Live

One of the keys to the Happiness Project was to figure you what makes you happy and what doesn’t.

One thing is for sure.  Exploring, even if it’s exploring my own backyard, makes me happy.

The blog posts that usually got the most views were the ones that involved my search for the lesser known attractions that brought character to the community.

I also learned this year that in order for a blog to be successful, you need to nail down an audience.  As happy as I was with the following my first blog created, I know that the subject matter was all over the place.  Sort of like my life.

So now it’s time to break it up and I will start with the Obscurus CNY blog.

I will back out there after the new year.  Get on the email list by going here.    here.    here.    

Now you can follow only my travel adventures without trudging through everything else.

It also gives me the added advantage to write a whim instead of the pressure of writing everyday.

Thank you for reading so far.


twHappy Travels.



Why I Started and Where I Ended Up.

There I was many reasons I felt compelled to start my own happiness project at the end of 2016.

For those that have joined recently, simply put, the happiness project was a years worth of resolutions geared towards making myself(and the other’s around me) happier.

Back to the reasons,  I think the biggest reason for my unhappiness was not having a clear direction to where I wanted to go and how I was gonna get there.

I had so many ideas and dreams but no clear way to execute or achieve them.

That’s one thing that my resolutions and travels helped me to achieve this year.  I took the time to learn about myself.  What works and what doesn’t.

As I look off into the distance and into the year 2018 ahead I know that this is the direction I’m going.  Is it the right one?  Who knows?  But that’s the way I am going to go.

What is that direction?

  1.  Make an impact on the community, outside the 4 walls of my work.
  2.   Find Happiness within the 4 walls of my home.
  3.   Explore, Discover, and Learn new things in my community, work, and leisure.
  4.   Set short-term and long-term goals, write them down, and work everyday to achieve them.


Said it before and I will say it again.  2017 was great but here’s to an amazing 2018



@Glowimages RTI01205.


Restaurant Hell Week & Christmas Leftovers

I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas.

If you are in the hospitality industry and are lucky enough to be closed or off on Christmas you know that it’s just a short reprieve before what I like to call “Restaurant Hell Week”

December 26th-Jan 1st can bring the craziest, cheapest, rudest customers out of hiding and into your restaurant doors all in the span of just a few days.

They are stressed from all their holiday spending.  Their kids are off all week and driving them insane.  And they are coming for YOU!!!!!.

Jan. 2nd is my favorite day of the year.  I don’t even mind that it’s slow.  It’s a moment to breathe and celebrate the survival of yet another holiday season.  Then the whole cycle begins again.

Oh well.  Here are some Christmas Leftovers before I begin wrapping up this project.